Perfect Timing for a Realtor's Open(casket) House

Welcome to the highest priced residence in Belleville, NJ. The historic converted 18th century mansion had been on the market for over six months at $1,650,000 with no takers. So it was time, last week, for the listing agent to pull out all the stops with a catered open house to alert local brokers to news of a huge price drop to $999,000. The chief selling point was the owner's amazingly luxurious residence on the two upper floors of the historic mansion that had been converted to "mixed use" on the ground floor.

"9000 square ft mixed use building with additional 2 story structure (10 car garage) and parking in rear. Ground floor appropriate for commercial use. 2nd floor is a residential renaissance masterpiece with work by Italian and French master craftsmen. Also includes Freight elevator, finished basement."

Until we arrived at the downtown Belleville address, most the invited brokers had no idea what the current commercial use was.  At the time I opened their creaky front door, all 3 sales persons were occupied on the upper floors, leaving me several creepy minutes to wander undisturbed through the ground floor establishment accompanied only by the funereal piped in mood music. In my mind, I channelled The Adams Family theme.